The Secret Paul Knew (And Now I Do Too)
Finding Contentment Through Faith When Life Feels Like a Prison - Part 2 of 2
“I rejoiced greatly in the Lord that at last you renewed your concern for me. Indeed, you were concerned, but you had no opportunity to show it. I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through him who gives me strength.”
Philippians 4:10-13 (NIV)
Last week, I shared my story of layoffs, survival mode, and the forty-year journey toward understanding that I was never alone. (If you missed Part 1, “The Secret I Didn’t Know I Was Learning,” I invite you to start there.) But today, I want to take you deeper into what it means to find true contentment through faith. Today, I want to share the secret.
Finding Joy in Difficult Circumstances
One of my heroes in the Bible is the Apostle Paul. And the reason is this: Paul wrote some of the most joy-filled words in Scripture while sitting in an actual prison cell.
Think about that. Chains on his wrists. Walls surrounding him. No idea when, or if, he would ever be free again. And yet he writes to the Philippians about rejoicing. Over and over again: rejoice, rejoice, rejoice.
How do you do that? How do you find joy in difficult circumstances when the doors are locked, the walls are bare, and your heart feels cold?
I’ve asked myself that question many times. Because while I’ve never been in a physical prison, I’ve known my own jails: divorce, death, illness, financial distress, loneliness, lack of community, marriage challenges, social and political concerns. Seasons where the walls felt like they were closing in and the questions had no answers, even when I was crying out to God for help during hard times.
How are You going to help me? I would whisper in the dark. And sometimes, all I heard was silence.
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The Secret to Being Content
But here’s what Paul understood that took me decades to grasp: contentment isn’t about your circumstances. It’s about your Source.
Read those verses again. Paul says he has “learned” to be content. He has “learned” the secret. This wasn’t something that came naturally to him. It wasn’t a personality trait or a spiritual gift reserved for super-Christians. Learning to be content was something he discovered through the living of his life, through the valleys and the victories, through the hunger and the plenty.
And that secret? “I can do all this through him who gives me strength.” This is the true meaning of Philippians 4:13, and it changed everything for me.
Not through willpower. Not through positive thinking. Not through trying harder or being stronger or white-knuckling my way through another hard season.
Through Him. Christ. The One who gives strength when I have none left to give. This is the heart of Christian encouragement for hard times.
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When Faith Changes Everything
For years, I tried to be my own source. My dad taught me to “look out for number one,” and I took that lesson to heart. I was independent. Self-sufficient. Capable.
The anxiety it caused was exhausting. Eventually leading to diagnosed depression.
But God. Those two words changed everything.
When I finally said yes to Jesus in 1995, He deposited something in my heart and spirit: the truth that He was always with me. That I didn’t have to carry it all alone. That the secret to finding peace in difficult seasons wasn’t about being stronger. It was about being surrendered.
It took another twenty years for that truth to move from my head to my heart. But when it did, that verse became so clear. When I took the focus off myself and gave it all to Jesus, contentment stopped being a destination I was striving toward and became a posture I was resting in. I finally understood how to find contentment through faith.
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Rediscovering Joy After Struggling
Here’s something I haven’t shared before. In high school, my nickname was “Giggles.” Friends and acquaintances would ask, “Why are you always smiling?” Sometimes they asked with genuine curiosity and sometimes with scowls on their own faces.
The truth is, I did my best not to show negative emotions. Because if I did, I felt like I would explode and be found out. The smile was real, but it was also a shield. It’s crazy because I loved bringing out the best in others and I still do. I never liked seeing anyone feeling sad. But underneath the giggles, I was carrying weight I didn’t know how to put down.
Looking back now, I see that the joy was always there, planted deep inside me. But it took years of learning the secret Paul knew for that joy to become rooted in something unshakeable. Not in my ability to keep smiling through the pain. Not in my performance. But in Christ alone. That’s the difference between surviving and truly finding joy in hard times.
The girl they called “Giggles” finally found a reason to smile that no circumstance could take away. Christlike contentment, just as the Apostle Paul shared in those verses, was something I could and have finally achieved.
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This Secret Is for You, Too
Maybe you’re sitting in your own kind of prison today. Maybe the walls feel like they’re closing in, and joy seems like a foreign language spoken by people who don’t understand your life.
Maybe you’ve been smiling through the pain for so long that you’ve forgotten what genuine rest feels like. Maybe you’re searching for encouragement for Christian women going through hard times.
Sister, I want you to know: you don’t have to have it all together. You don’t have to be your own source of strength. You don’t have to keep white-knuckling your way through.
The secret Paul learned in his prison cell, the same secret God has been teaching me across forty years of my own messy, beautiful life, is available to you right now. Right where you are. In the middle of whatever you’re walking through.
You can do all things through Christ who gives you strength. Not because you’re enough on your own. But because He is. That’s the truth of Philippians 4:13, and it can carry you through anything.
A gentle note: If you’re walking through something that involves harm, whether to yourself or from someone else, please know that faith and professional help are not opposites. God often works through counselors, therapists, and trained professionals. Seeking help is not a lack of faith. It’s wisdom. You are worth protecting.
A Prayer for Strength and Contentment
“Lord, I lift up my sister who is reading this right now. You know the prison she’s sitting in, whether it has physical walls or walls made of worry, loneliness, exhaustion, or fear. You see her. You have always seen her.
Teach her the secret Paul knew. Not as head knowledge, but as heart knowledge. Help her release her grip on being her own source and surrender to You, the only Source that never runs dry.
Restore the joy she may have lost along the way. Not the joy that’s a performance or a shield, but the deep, unshakeable joy that comes from being rooted in You.
Thank You for never giving up on her. Thank You for meeting her right where she is.
In Jesus’ name, Amen.”🙏🏼
Your Turn: What “prison” are you sitting in today? And what would it look like to stop being your own source and let Christ be your strength?
I’d love to hear from you in the comments.
And if this two-part series has ministered to you, would you share it with a sister who needs to know the secret too?
